Today at the gym I noticed it’s less crowded than it was in January which is common. We begin each year committed to our resolutions only to give up around early March.
This was my story each year.
Nine years ago I attended a spiritual retreat and this prodigal daughter finally returned home to Christ.
Later in prayer I confessed to God my disdain with myself, particularly my body and my mind.
For years I loathed myself, treating her like trash instead of the temple she is.
I fed her trash foods and crap thoughts, punished her with harsh criticisms and cruelly withheld love from her somehow believing that would force her into being who I wanted her to be. Sad, I know.
I told Him everything I hoped to have, do and become.
And I complained about my body and weight I gained that wouldn’t budge. How it must have hurt Him to hear me criticize His handiwork this way.
When I was done, instead of being angry He asked me a simple yet powerful question: “Why?” as in why do you want to lose weight?
I was about to learn a life-changing lesson.
How we answer the question of “Why” reveals our beliefs which determine our success because life is simply a reflection of our beliefs.
My why was the belief that if I lost weight then others would love me which would mean I was worth loving. This belief was a lie because (a) I was already loved and worth loving and (b)we can’t control how others feel about us.
By trying to change my internal beliefs externally I failed at not only losing weight but everything else I had attempted because I had yet to learn that a transformed life begins with a transformed mind.
Success is an inside job.
God gently informed me that He already loved me and it had nothing to do with my weight, the number of social media “friends” I had, my credit score, my mistakes, my past, my successes or failures. He just loved me, unconditionally, as-is. Period.
And in that moment everything changed. I threw away my old belief which was a lie and accepted His truth.
My why then changed which changed my determination to not only lose weight but to love and appreciate the wonder that I am.
My new why for getting healthy was my desire for increased energy I needed to live the life I imagined while also learning to value myself in the process.
That was a positive and powerful why that could produce a win.
I learned that internal beliefs like self-worth can’t be created externally because we can’t control the external.
Our why always reveals our beliefs and either leads us towards or away from what we want.
So, when deciding what you want, first ask yourself why you want it.
If your “why” uncovers a defeating, false belief or is dependent on others’ opinions, then immediately seek a truth to replace the lie.
How do you know if your belief is lie? If what you think is true is the opposite of what God’s Word says about you, it’s a lie.
Your success will always be dependent on your why which will always be shaped by your beliefs.
Your why is the fuel that keeps hope alive and keeps you going when you want to quit.
Creating a why that wins starts with being honest about what we believe, confronting it and if it’s a lie then changing it because we can’t change what we refuse to confront.
God’s Truth of Who we are in Him is the solid foundation on which to construct a beautiful, meaningful life.
Paul wrote “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” (Rom 12:2) NIV
God transforms us beginning with changing what we believe. Yes! Our beliefs are that important and powerful.
What if you made a list of your top five desires and ask yourself why you want each one?
If your why reveals a false belief that’s keeping you from having that desire, confront it, chunk it and replace it with God’s Truth.
Then create a new why built on those new truths and go after what you want!
When you create a Why that wins – you win.